♈ Aries (Mar 21 – Apr 19): You’re basically a tequila shot in human form — fiery, bold, and probably the reason your group chat says “never again.” You don’t drink, you perform.
♉ Taurus (Apr 20 – May 20): You’re an espresso martini — classy, smooth, and pretending you have your life together when you’re running on pure chaos and caffeine.
♊ Gemini (May 21 – Jun 20): You’re a Long Island Iced Tea — fun, unpredictable, and somehow both everyone’s favorite and worst decision at the same time.
♋ Cancer (Jun 21 – Jul 22): You’re a piña colada — soft, sweet, and crying in the corner while still making everyone else feel taken care of. Emotional support cocktail energy.
♌ Leo (Jul 23 – Aug 22): Champagne. Obviously. You sparkle, you pop off, and you demand to be the center of the toast. If no one’s filming you, what’s the point?
♍ Virgo (Aug 23 – Sep 22): You’re a gin and tonic — crisp, reliable, and slightly judgmental. You’d correct the bartender’s pour if you could.
♎ Libra (Sep 23 – Oct 22): You’re a mojito — bubbly, balanced, and flirty. You could charm your way into free drinks and out of a speeding ticket before happy hour ends.
♏ Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21): You’re a dark rum — mysterious, smooth, and a little dangerous. People know better… but still can’t resist a taste.
♐ Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21): You’re a margarita — loud, fun, and maybe slightly feral. You’re here for a good time, not a long one, and you will convince everyone to take a round of shots.
♑ Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19): Whiskey neat. Straightforward, no nonsense, and if someone waters you down — you’re done. You sip with purpose and judge quietly.
♒ Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 18): You’re absinthe — unique, unpredictable, and a little concerning. You’ll lecture people about “artistic energy” while making questionable choices.
♓ Pisces (Feb 19 – Mar 20): You’re rosé with glitter — soft, sparkly, and crying in the club but still somehow the life of the party. You’re a vibe and a mess, and we love that for you.